Love and Prostitutes

I was able to share a message about God’s love based on the Book of Hosea to a group of teachers at my school . These are my notes:

When Miranda and I got married, our pre-marital counselor said we need to learn to “Expect nothing, and appreciate everything.” He was right. I can’t tell you how many arguments we could have avoided if I had been better at this. I’m too selfish to notice everything Miranda does and so I’m not very appreciative sometimes. I’m also so self absorbed that I start expecting things out of her that are not her responsibility. My expectations can become unreasonable really quickly. I try to do better, but Love is hard. It just is.

I saw this quote on social media yesterday:

Ann Voskamp – “I mean, it’s everywhere, the songs and the reels and Kool aid that Love is all the pinnacle, posed moments, the glam and roses and framed moments, the high moments when we are about walking on air. But truth is: Real love isn’t made on the heights but made in the depths, real love isn’t a peak experience, but experienced in the pits, and real love is found strong right at rock bottom.

The love you’re looking for is found in the last place you’d look: in the valleys, and in the pits, and when everything else gives way — and one person reaches out and gives you their hand. Love Himself saves you not because you earned it at the mountain top, but because He holds you at Rock bottom.”

Rock bottom. I’ve witnessed rock bottom. As you may already know, my wife has taken on a new role as the Executive Director of the Refuge for Women Gulf Coast. They offer trafficked women a 2-year program to empower and equip them with the Gospel. They offer aftercare and support with the goal of giving them a fresh start by helping them develop a true relationship with Jesus as well as working through issues caused by their trauma. Miranda and I developed good relationships with several of the women in the house through a Bible Study that we led. They won our hearts very quickly and had such a deep hunger for God that our time together was truly something we treasured. With their past trauma, they had been starved for healthy relationships, and so once they recognized that we could be trusted, we had their hearts too. Anyway, through our experiences with these women, Miranda and I have come to see the Book of Hosea in a new light. The story centers around a man of God (Hosea) and a prostitute named Gomer. God chose Hosea and Gomer, the prostitute, as the central figures to bring His message of love to His people. Miranda and I feel the same way about the women we have met. Anyway, in case you don’t know it, here’s the story.

Hosea 1:2-9 – “When the Lord first spoke through Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea, “Go, take to yourself a wife of whoredom and have children of whoredom, for the land commits great whoredom by forsaking the Lord.” 3 So he went and took Gomer, the daughter of Diblaim, and she conceived and bore him a son.
4 And the Lord said to him, “Call his name Jezreel, (which mean “Judgement is Coming”) for in just a little while I will punish the house of Jehu for the blood of Jezreel, and I will put an end to the kingdom of the house of Israel. 5 And on that day I will break the bow of Israel in the Valley of Jezreel.”
6 She conceived again and bore a daughter. And the Lord said to him, “Call her name No Mercy, for I will no more have mercy on the house of Israel, to forgive them at all. 7 But I will have mercy on the house of Judah, and I will save them by the Lord their God. I will not save them by bow or by sword or by war or by horses or by horsemen.”
8 When she had weaned No Mercy, she conceived and bore a son. 9 And the Lord said, “Call his name Not My People, for you are not my people, and I am not your God.”

In chapter 1, God asks Hosea to marry a prostitute. Yeah – you heard that right. This probably isn’t one of the Bible stories you were taught as a kid in Sunday School. God tells him to marry a prostitute, but it’s more than that. He is also supposed to love her. To truly love her.

Hosea was a Godly man, so in spite of how he probably felt about this, he obeyed. Think about what this would do to his reputation as a prophet of God. Anyway, he chose to take Gomer as his wife, and he chose to love her. They have 3 kids. Their first son is, Jezreel (means “Judgement is coming.”) Then they have a daughter named “No Mercy,” and finally another son named, “Not my people.” Most scholars believe that Hosea was probably not even the father of this one. Gomer had been coming and going back and forth between Hosea and her previous lifestyle. Like the girls I know from the Refuge for Women, she had probably been trafficked from an early age and hadn’t known any other way of life. Can you imagine? Hosea is supposed to love her like God loves His people. No matter what she did. In spite of her behavior, he had to choose to love her. In spite of his own feelings, he was committed to love her and to act on her behalf always seeking what was best for her. Hosea worked really hard to provide a great life for her. She had everything she could ever really need, but she continued to go back each night to her old habits – her old lifestyle – her old sin. Chapter 2 tells us that each morning when she returned, Hosea had gifts waiting for her. He loved her and cared for her even while she was hurting him. She happily received his gifts, but then gave them as sacrifices to another God. As parents we put up barriers and fences to get out kids to stay within certain boundaries. Hosea did the same thing and tried putting out thorns and obstacles so the path back to her sinful life would be more difficult, but she still trekked through. She was willing to hurt herself in order to get back to her sin. It represented who she believed that she was. Her identity was wrapped up in this old lifestyle. She didn’t really know how to be anyone else. So no matter what Hosea did, nothing he did seemed to work. She still continued to go back to her sin.

So. . . . what do you do? If you’re the parent here? What do you do when your kids keep making the same sinful choice over and over again? How do you respond when they keep going back to their same old sin. If you’re the teacher here, what do you do? What do you do when that same student continues to do the same wrong things over and over again? When they’re purposefully trying to push your button, what do you do?

Well. . . . here’s what God asked Hosea to do:
In chapter 3, she has hit rock bottom again. She has left Hosea and her children and has been living in her sin long enough that she has become a slave. When Hosea shows up in town he finds her on the auction block. He pushes his way through the crowd and looks up at his bride. She’s a mess, broken, battered, beaten, disgusting . . . and she chose this life for herself – over the life he had offered her. She probably can’t look him in the eye. She has broken his heart and abandoned their children. She had been with countless other men. His anger pushes to the forefront of his mind as he thinks about all that she has done – the pain both he and his children have been through. Is there a part of him that feels justice has been served as he draws closer to the auction block? Does he think she’s getting what she deserves? Does He push through the crowd and demand the divorce that everyone would have respectfully granted him? No!! Instead, he humbled himself. He pushes back on his anger and his pain and chooses to love her. He puts her first and he knows what would best serve her. He bore the cost and paid the price to buy her back. She was already his, but he bought his wife back. He chose to love her in spite of what he was feeling. In spite of what everyone expected him to do. He had every right to a divorce, but His understanding of God’s redeeming love, compelled him to a different decision. He chose to act on behalf of her eternal good in spite of how he probably felt. He chose sacrifice and humility. He chose love.

The impossible never ending compassion of God to his people. After they forsake him again and again and again, He restores. He loves “in spite of.”

Not only does Hosea take her back. He also offers her hope and a future. Check out these other verses:

Hosea 2:14-15 – “Therefore, behold, I will allure her,
and bring her into the wilderness,
and speak tenderly to her.
And there I will give her her vineyards
and make the Valley of Achor a door of hope.
And there she shall answer as in the days of her youth,
as at the time when she came out of the land of Egypt.
2:19-20
I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy. I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the LORD.
2:23
And I will have mercy on No Mercy,
and I will say to Not My Peoplei ‘You are my people’;
and he shall say, ‘You are my God.

This whole story is really just a picture of what God has already done for his people. Think about it. God rescued the Israelites from slavery in Egypt and then on Mt Sinai with the 10 Commandments, he made a covenant with them. (They were enslaved, He rescued them. They got married.) Now, when God brought them into the promised land, they rebelled. They took the things He gave them in their new land, and then they offered them to other gods. God could have divorced Israel, but instead He continued to rescue them and restore them and renew their covenant. No matter what we do, He still chooses us. He still loves us.

It’s the same today. The Hosea/Gomer story is our story too. He loves us. We rebel with our sin. And He still chooses to love us. His is a “redeeming love.” Hosea bought his bride, but Jesus bought us too. The price of our sin was death, and He chose to pay that price on the cross. We have been bought.

By the way, no one buys something and then walks away leaving it in the store. When you order from amazon, you expect to receive the package. When you by something, especially something that you paid a high price for, you get to have it. Does Jesus have you? Has He received you? You’re like the amazon package here. Have you placed yourself on Jesus’ doorstep so He can use you? Like Gomer, are there gifts He’s given you that you are using in ways that would not make Him happy? In what ways are you living your old sinful life? What habits are killing you softly bit by bit? How long before these things accumulate in such a way that you find yourself up on the auction block? How can you find your way back to Jesus now? How can you settle into His arms and recognize His great affection for you today? How can you begin the new life He desires for you? What habits do you need to develop so you can live with Him?

 

Redeeming Love

I finished an audiobook recently called “Redeeming Love” by Francine Rivers. It’s not the kind of book that I would normally read, but it was only $7 on itunes and I had a giftcard to use. Also, the book just came up in the most random conversations quite a few separate times so I thought I’d give it a shot.

The book tells the story the marriage of a girl who goes by quite a few names (Angel, Amanda, Sarah) and her husband Michael Hosea. She was a prostitute, but God told Michael to marry her anyway. It makes for an interesting set of circumstances in which He tries to love her in spite of her “baggage” and she struggles to receive the love that He offers to her – all-the-while trying to learn how to live a new way of life as a wife. The story also mirrors the Biblical account of the prophet Hosea with is prostitute bride, Gomer. Although Redeeming Love takes place in a completely different setting and the author doesn’t follow the Biblical account exactly, there are certainly many similarities. Rivers says herself that her intention was to retell the Biblical story and I’d say she has done a great job of it.

For me, this was a good story to hear during this time in my life. I have been looking for a job for almost a year. I feel like I have tried everything I know – I finished an alternative certification program and have interviewed for a few teaching positions, but I still seem to be coming up short. As a man who wants to provide for his family and make a difference in the lives of students, I feel worthless sometimes. I know God is using this time to mold me and He’s using it in ways I’ll probably never understand, but my knowledge of those things doesn’t make the emotional turmoil I’m feeling go away. With each interview, my hopes are ignited, but with each phone call saying they have chosen someone with more experience, those hopes are thrown to the ground once again. This emotional roller coaster is wearing on me. Today, I spoke harshly to my wife for no reason. This is not who I am – but it seems to be . . . well. . . who I am right now, and it’s not acceptable.

In Redeeming Love, after getting married and running away from Michael, Sarah eventually finds herself on the auction block being sold as a slave. (I can identify – life is being stripped away from me too.) But then, in the last possible moment, Sarah is bought and redeemed. She eventually finds her way back to Michael.

The hope in this story is helpful. My only problem is that I feel like I’ve been on the auction block for a while and for some reason – I guess God thinks I can handle even more stripping before He steps in – or maybe there’s more to learn?? or new habits to develop?? or new thoughts to develop??

Prayer: Lord, if you’re listening, I’m ready. I need You. I need Your help. I cannot do this. I have no power or control. I want to be who You have called me to be. (and I believe that’s a teacher) I want to provide for my family. I want to help students to understand the world around them and live productive lives. I am weak and I need Your strength. I am desperate, but I know You are in control. I will trust You. Help me to stand strong, to trust more, to notice Your gentle nudges and respond appropriately. Lord, help me to be and to become all that You’ve called me to. I surrender. Redeem me. AMEN.